Online Grooming

Article

Online Grooming

Grooming happens when someone builds trust with a young person to exploit or harm them. This article explains the warning signs, the emotional impact, and safe steps to protect yourself and seek support.

22 Oct 2025
1 min read
online-grooming-inner-desktop
Text Size:
Young boy secretly using his phone late at night

What Is Online Grooming?

Online grooming is when someone builds a close, emotional relationship with a person under 18, usually with the goal of sexual exploitation, gratification, or abuse. This can happen on online platforms such as forums, games, group chat, social media, or messaging apps.

To gain your trust, these strangers may:

  • Shower you with compliments and romantic messages to make you feel special
  • Pretend to be your age, live nearby, or share the same interests
  • Claim to have mutual friends, even if you’ve never met them
  • Speak or act in ways that don’t match their claimed age or background
  • Ask a lot about your life but avoid sharing much about theirs
  • Try to keep the relationship secret or push to move the chat to private spaces
  • Send unwanted nudes or pressure you to send your own

How Can Online Grooming Affect Me?

Online grooming can cause lasting emotional, mental, and even physical harm. You might feel betrayed, scared, or blame yourself for what happened. It can also affect your ability to trust others in the future.

Grooming is hard to spot because the other person often makes the relationship feel natural and caring at first. Here are some signs that could mean you’re being groomed:

Young boy secretly using his phone late at night
  • You’re glued to your phone or constantly checking messages from this person
  • You feel nervous or secretive about your online chats, especially with them
  • You’ve been asked to keep the relationship private or hide it from people you trust
  • You start using sexual language that you’ve learned from this person
  • You receive gifts, money, or favours you didn’t ask for or can’t explain
  • You feel more withdrawn, anxious, irritated, or aggressive than usual

What Should I Do If I Think Someone Is Grooming Me Online?

Sometimes, it might not be immediately clear if someone is befriending you sincerely or with the intention of grooming you. Here are some ways you can keep yourself safe:

Set Boundaries Online

  • Take a break from the conversation and give yourself time to think.
  • Stop replying or unfollow the person if you feel uncomfortable.
  • Adjust your privacy settings so that only people you know can view your posts or message you.

Think Before You Act

  • Be cautious about what you share and avoid sending photos, videos, or personal information that reveals too much about yourself.
  • Think critically about what they say and question anything that doesn’t feel right or seems too good to be true.
  • Don’t let anyone pressure you into quick decisions like meeting up or sending nudes.

Report Inappropriate Content

  • Block the user to stop further contact, especially if they make you feel unsafe.
  • If the user sends messages, photos, or videos that cross the line, use the platform’s tools to report the user and their content.
  • Take screenshots of any messages or content, so you can include them in your report if needed.

Engage A Trusted Person And Seek Support

  • Talk to a trusted adult, older sibling, teacher, or school counsellor for advice and support.
  • If you require more help, reach out to a helpline or support service.

What Should I Do?

A person I barely know keeps commenting on my posts and complimenting me through direct messages. I feel creeped out, what should I do?

If someone’s attention is making you uncomfortable, it’s okay to set boundaries. Here’s what you can do:

  • Tell them to stop: Clearly say you’re not okay with those kinds of messages and ask them to stop
  • Adjust privacy settings: Adjust your privacy settings so they can’t see your posts or message you directly.
  • Block and report the user: If the behaviour continues or feels inappropriate, block the user and report it to the platform.
  • Reach out for support: Talk to someone you trust, like your parents, teachers, school counsellors, or close friends, especially if the behaviour starts to feel persistent or threatening.

I met some friends through an online interest group. One of them started to give me a lot of attention and shower me with gifts. What should I do?

Getting attention and gifts from someone might feel flattering at first, but it’s important to pause and think about how it makes you feel and what their intentions might be. Here’s what you can do:

  • Check in with yourself: If something feels off, it probably is. Take a break from the conversation and give yourself time to think.
  • Set boundaries: Clearly state to them what you’re comfortable with. For example, you can politely say that while you appreciate the gesture, you don’t feel right accepting gifts.
  • Reach out for support: Talk to someone you trust, like your parents, teachers, school counsellors, or close friends. They can help you figure out if the situation feels safe and respectful.
  • Be cautious: If the person gets upset when you set boundaries or continues pushing them, it may be a sign that their intention might not be right.

Just because someone gives you attention or gifts doesn’t mean you owe them anything in return. If their behaviour continues or makes you feel unsafe:

  • Tell them to stop: Clearly say you’re not okay with their actions.
  • Collect evidence: Save messages, photos, or anything that shows their intention in case you need to report them.
  • Block and report: Use the platform’s tools to block them and report any inappropriate behaviour.

Want more tips and tools to build healthier digital habits? Come along and Scroll Smart, Surf Safe with us.

Resource tagged:

How useful is this resource?

Not useful

You may be interested